You can take your "checked box" and.....

Even before I became a Mother, I knew deep down that I would be overprotective of my children. Always wanting to keep them safe and wanting nothing but the best for them. With Alex, I am probably 10 times over what I should be, because he has so many more needs and I am always worrying about him being ok. I know that both of my boys will be subjected to teasing and even ridicule as I think all of us as children are. I know I was. It is hard as a parent to wonder and worry about things like this as much as it is to experience failure. I don't ever want either of them to think or feel like they are a failure, that is why dealing with certain things when it comes to my boys is especially hard on me.

With the boys going into Kindergarten next year, (I know right?) they have been doing hearing and vision screenings so they are all set with the paperwork. I was unaware of the vision screen back in September but I got the paperwork yesterday that Evan passed. There was also a slip for Alex and his was noted that he was "unable to screen". I know this. It isn't news to me that my child cannot read the letters provided or speak to the person screening him. I guess I just don't understand why they would even attempt to screen him when they know he won't pass and then give me a slip of paper that pretty much says FAIL on it. I guess they are just doing their jobs. I know they have to screen him for their records and maybe it just stings a little when I see something like that. He sees an eye specialist, so I planned on getting a report from him before school starts so that they have it on paper that he can see just fine and that his vision is good. I know all is good, but it broke my heart into a million pieces when I saw his note.

As for the hearing test, I was actually there the day they did that so I was in the room with him. The objective was that when the child heard the noise they were to put a block in the bucket. Well, Alex isn't going to make that connection, but I explained to the screener that I bet he will make some sort of facial expression when he hears the noise. Sure enough he smiled when it beeped into his ear on the headphones. We went through the whole process and then she tells me that she can't pass him because he didn't do the test the way they require it. It took everything in me not to smack her across the face for being ignorant. What was the point of making him sit there and go through it when you were going to fail him either way? Can you tell my blood was boiling? So now I get to look forward to receiving that slip of paper with the "unable to screen" box checked off again.

I am sure some people are going to read this and think I am being overly dramatic and I shouldn't let it "get to me" or I shouldn't stress because it "isn't that big of a deal". Well it IS a big deal to me.
My child is special needs and he is in a General Education class. I am grateful for that, but if you know that he isn't going to pass the screening, then why put him through it? Why not just contact me to see if there is a way for me to get the information you are looking for instead of making my kid look like a failure? It is different if there is an underlying issue that I don't know about, but with Alex it is pretty cut and dry. He is non-verbal and there are certain connections that his brain just cannot make.

I get it. They are doing their jobs and while I am grateful that Alex is included in these screenings, it just gets emotions running high within me because it completely zeros in on the fact that he has this disability and there are certain things he just cannot do.

I am sure these situations will get easier and just become the "norm" for me, but today I wanted my voice to be heard because no matter what box is checked, Alex will NEVER be a failure in my eyes.

WINNER