Brighter Days

Five years ago on this day, my boys were one day shy of celebrating their one month birthday. They still technically would have only been 35 weeks but it was a big deal seeing what they had already been through. Our celebration turned to heartbreak that Friday afternoon when we were told of Alex's diagnosis.

Looking back to that day, I could have never imagined the amount of joy Alex would bring us. The happiness and accomplishments have outweighed the tears and difficulties. I know he still has a long road ahead of him, but that is not going to hold us back from doing all we can.

He has touched so many people with his infectious smile. It is crazy how many people are drawn to him. Some even swoon and he loves every second of it. I think the most asked question about Alex that I get is "Is he always this happy?" For my non-verbal child to leave such an impression on people with just his smile, that in itself is something to be proud of.

I wish I would have believed myself five years ago when I told Alex everything would be OK. It was so overwhelming that in my own heart I couldn't believe it. I was SO scared. I was a first time Mom...to twins...and one would have a lifelong disability. It was a lot to take in....some days it still is. Over the years and with the help of my husband, I have finally started believing it myself.

I have become quite a fighter through all of this. I have to show both of my boys how much I care, how much I believe in them because I don't ever want them to give up or stop believing in themselves. Maybe that is my sole purpose in all of this. Who knows.

Alex is who he is and we love every single piece of him. This isn't what any of us expected, but it is the hand that we were dealt and we make the best of each day. There are some things that I have finally accepted and are OK with and there are others that still pull at my heart strings. But I think that is because I have such an intense love for both of my children and that is to be expected.

So for those of you that are going through something difficult, just know that you aren't alone and there are brighter days ahead. You have to believe in your heart that it will be OK because that is the only way you will get through it. You have to stay strong and behind everything is a reason, even if you don't understand that reason. That dark day five years ago barely exists in my mind. It has been completely overshadowed by all of the brighter days since then.